#since my friend used choice ones to get me interested lol (it very much worked!)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Fellow Psych enjoyer!! Im watchin psych at this very moment lol, i know its a tough question bc i dont even have a definitive answer but like, what's your favorite episode?

hmmm well i did very much enjoy the episode where Lassiter & Henry bond over fishing... i also like the episode where Shawn gets kidnapped & ends up on top of a moving car <3

[lover-of-mine]

it's also not lost on me that the people acting like those who don't care about bucktommy want buck to never have been with another man, are now turning around and saying that eddie should be alone for the rest of his life if he doesn't end up with buck...just say you hate characters of color if they don't exist to serve as props for the pretty white boy and go lol

I mean, literally, people don't even want Eddie to have loved his wife because that would make it so he didn't always exist for Buck. If he's not a prop on Buck's story, he's nothing for some people and that's very telling. Buck needs to fuck all of LA but Eddie needs to be the sad widower forever. Just say you hate Eddie and only shipped buddie because it was the only option and go.

But, anon, darling, since I'm going controversial right now because I don't give a fuck anymore and I'm just tired, I'm gonna use this to say my most controversial Buck/Eddie thought ever. I think narratively, you can introduce a love interest for Eddie, man or woman, that would be a satisfying endgame relationship for him in a way you can't do with Buck. Obviously, it wouldn't be as satisfying as if he ends up with Buck, I think that buddie is the natural progression of the narrative for both Buck and Eddie. And I desperately want that payoff. That being said, considering the way that what stops Eddie from pursuing actual happiness in a romantic relationship is pretty much his status as a widower, the way he can't let go of what he thinks he could've had with Shannon if he had made different choices, and this idea of what he needs to provide in a relationship that goes against what he actually needs, to have him realize that and meet someone who helps him be happy that he is alive again could work. To suddenly give him that spark he keeps saying he wants and let him settle into it could work. It would have to be constructed carefully, but it can be constructed. Buck on the other hand, his endgame relationship needs a level of construction that would take an amount of work the show just doesn't have the time to build anymore. Unless the show is gonna have 20 seasons and give grey's anatomy a run for its money. Because considering the way Buck keeps letting himself be chased because he wants stability but he's too scared to actually do something about it and end up making the wrong choice, he needs a friends to lovers arc for it to be satisfying. Buck needs that initial level of partnership outside of the physical connection before he gets into a romantic relationship in my opinion. Even more considering Buck's relationship with sex, his own body, his sense of self worth, I think he needs someone who will see him fully before wanting to add romance into it and that's Eddie. They don't have the time to introduce someone who will take this spot in Buck's life and have it naturally progress into something romantic because that spot is already filled. Buck has been consistently shown as someone who jumps into the physical aspect of a relationship first, from groovyheels to Tommy, so I think that the only relationship that would feel truly satisfying for Buck to end up in, is one with someone who loved him without the physical first. And that's always gonna be Eddie. There's no way to add a second best friend for Buck at this point of the show. So someone else is never gonna live up to this need Buck has to be understood beyond what he can offer. To be loved anyway. For Buck it's always gonna be Eddie. But I think Eddie could learn to be loved by someone else if the show really wanted to keep them apart. I don't want it to happen, I want both of them together, I think it's the best ending for the story they are telling, but in a reality where buddie is not on the table, I think it makes more sense for Buck to end up alone than Eddie. It would be tragic. But it would make more sense than Buck with whoever and Eddie alone.

And also the people who want Eddie to be alone need to go. Along with the people who want Eddie to die so that bt can raise Chris. Along with the people who think Eddie is a prop on Buck's story. Along with the people who can't seem to see Eddie beyond what he can offer Buck. Along with everyone who can't seem to understand Eddie is also a main character. Anyone who doesn't see Eddie as his own character needs to go.

[cancerian-woman]

I won't be offended if you prefer to delete this but your post about Tyler had me thinking...

Caroline really made his grief over his mother dying about her so much so that she issued the worst ultimatum and left herself with...

A drunk old man that used to be her teacher.

A long time friend that never seemed like he got over Elena and definitely has codependent issues with his brother so much so that he sacrificed himself willingly a day after their wedding.

And a power hungry hybrid who gave her money he could more than afford to give and said pretty words but also tortured, enslaved and killed people she was connected to....and also definitely had codependent issues with his brother.

I cannot fathom it.

All true facts. It’s late here so a meta! :D

As a huge Forwood shipper and I’m equally very critical of them. It’s a great ship for them both at first, then becomes a ship only for Caroline’s needs and development which isn’t fair to Tyler That Klaroline/Steroline shadow made those fans believe Tyler was the worst Caroline could get. When in reality he was the BEST romantic partner and friend she ever had.

What upsets me more about that ultimatum that Caroline FORCED is that she’s the only one we see comforting Tyler after Carol’s death. Even before Carol died, and Tyler was skeptical about being alpha she uplifted him and Tyler heavily respected what she had to say and went full force with it. Mind you, this is the same Tyler that broke every bone in his body just to be with Caroline. Then re-agreed to slavery for Care. Forwood communicated with each other and called out their faults. The other tvdu ships weren’t doing that!—then we get this full arc of Caroline’s grief and remember she bluntly told Tyler to get over the fact that she hooked up with Klaus because of her impulses and she’s not good1!!1

The series wanted to bury Forwood and they did so in the worst ways imaginable. Caroline gets pregnant with Alaric’s babies forcibly. (I understand Candice was pregnant but they could’ve hid her belly so Caroline wasn’t pregnant.)-Oh and we can’t forget Alaric was in love with her and proposed.

Steroline was supposed to follow the friends to lovers build up the way Forwood did and it never appears that Stefan is all in the way Caroline is. Tbh, even before the wedding Stefan wanted out the relationship he tried multiple times to end things in s8. Caroline refused and wanted it to work. Building them up after Liz’s death was a choice. Stefan manipulated Caroline heavily to when it came Tyler and their relationship.

Klaroline has no obstacles to pass with them. Klaus may give Caroline pretty things, and money but emotionally he’s never shown to give Caroline any support. When Caroline saves Bonnie from those 12 witches which is her first huge kill(correct me if I’m wrong) since s2 she immediately goes to Klaus and he basically tells her to get away from him. Klaus mentions how she’s too good for that small town but Caroline had never said she hated her home. What she did hate was Klaus grown ass destroying shit. They never had a serious conversation about anything tbh. I did enjoy how Caroline called him out at first but TO’s “you aren’t the villain in my story.” Ruined that. Oh and lol these shippers get on Damon for his rape of Caroline yet somehow, someway excuses that Klaus attempted to rape Caroline too in Tyler’s body…. Anyways! I do think a lot of Klaroline is rooted in Klaus wanting control over Tyler, and Caroline is a way to exert control over Tyler because of his love for her.

Okay this is long af, sorry! To end this off Tyler loved Caroline for who she was. He never wanted her to change, he valued and respected her. Never abused her or anyone she loved. He listened to what she had to say. Caroline’s other love interests NEVER saw her the way Tyler did. Btw, I wish people understood Tyler never, not once slutshamed Caroline for having sex with someone else. He was only mad that she slept with Klaus as if Klaus did not ruin Tyler’s life and murdered his mother. There’s obviously a reason Caroline didn’t want Tyler to know and continued to ignore the boundaries he placed up in s5 so they could just go back to the way SHE wanted them to be. It’s sad they were ruined because 5B of Forwood has moments where you can forget their broken up just based on Forwood’s chemistry. I forgot to add, some fans pretend Tyler couldn’t give Caroline a good life. Tyler wasn’t financially struggling, and would’ve done anything she asked of him. I think it’s a little problematic that Tyler did say everything he liked about himself was Caroline lol. But, he wanted nothing but her and their happiness. Just without the enslavement from Klaus.

Thank you for the ask!

[aciddaffodil]

Winter 2024- What I Finished

So as this anime season is coming to an end. Here are the shows I actually kept up with and overall enjoyed immensely.

There will be spoilers so be warned lol

The Unwanted Undead Adventurer

I have enjoyed this series, the way Rentt is so determined to become a mithril-class adventurer even as an undead. The 3D models for the fight scenes move pretty well with the background matching them, especially in episode 9. This series is a slow-burn, even with the story progression, but I appreciate it because we see so much character growth for Rentt and how he interacts with the people and his friends. The music is fairly average for the series, but it does have some good moments especially when Rentt is in thought or making a choice. I loved coming full circle and him regaining his "human" features even though he still is very much a vampire now. Shun Narita, the composer for the series had some standout moments (fight scenes and contemplativeness) of music throughout the season so hats off to him.

The Wrong Way to Use Healing Magic

I fell in love with the humor of this series from the get-go and not a single episode is a disappointment. It is so full of life and this past week for episode 11, the line " Now that's the wrong way to use healing magic" was used in a perfect moment. The lead up of Usato's characters growth and seeing all his hard work and "torture" from Commander Rose's training *actually* matter was brilliant. Element Garden has done a great job with the music that just gets your blood pumping. Probably will make a separate post for this series once it's over.

A Sign of Affection

The shoujo everyone is talking about, FOR GOOD REASON. To see the romance between the leads develop was so satisfying and wholesome. The development of the side characters so far is handled well, and at times the flashbacks scenes take over an episode but they are necessary. The art style and the use of lighting are done so well. It was a very cute show and always will love seeing an adult romance.

Solo Leveling

What can I say that hasn't been said already? I started reading the manwha in 2019 and have reread many times since. Hiroyuki Sawano was a great choice and the soundtrack WILL be on loop once it's released fully. Smart pacing choices to have it end with him gaining a job, this week will be a blast of an episode. Wish it had been slotted for 24 episodes... The last two episodes KILLED it, the animation, the music?! I was on cloud nine.

Mr. Villains Day Off

A perfect wholesome background anime, that is just about a Villian who loves pandas on his days off. The episodes where they focus on the Rangers aren't super interesting and makes you question the ethics of the world? It's a very cute show and sometimes, it's just a need in life. Ending was split between resolving the previous episode and the lead up to the Rangers and the Villian's battle.

Villainess Level 99: I May Be the Hidden Boss but I'm Not the Demon Lord

The Isekai'd into an Otome game genre is SO saturated but somehow I ended up loving this show. Yumielle is so autistic coded and straightforward, no one quite knows how to react to her. Patrick is head over heels for her, not that she ever notices, and they're dynamic is adorable. I have laughed watching this show and the only reincarnation anime that didn't bog me down with guessable plot.

Hokkaido Gals Are Super Adorable!

I fell so hard for this anime that I binge read the manga...who's art is definitely butchered in the adaption, it's so wholesome but the way episode 11 ends off MY GOD the miscommunication hurts me, and people will definitely riot watching the finale...and then picking up the manga to suffer for 40 chapters...BUT it's worth it. Tsubasa and Fuyuki all the way, they're chemistry is the best in the show as they each influence each other to open up, to be serious about the future and to help themselves grow as people. So sad to see this show go but maybe we'll get another season?

Cherry Magic! Thirty Years of Virginity Can Make You a Wizard?!

This anime has me kicking my feet in joy and makes me miss my long-distance partner so fucking much. When Kurosawa and Adachi kissed? I was whooping in happiness. Adachi has a lot of room to grow with his communication with Kurosawa but pretty sure the final manga cover is a wedding outfit? My poor notes app I use to write my thoughts/observations as I watch seasonal anime is " SO GAY. KISS PLEASE." for several episodes between them. I loved that the end credits was the wedding but I can't wait to read the manga to compare it!

Gushing Over Magical Girls

I'm not one to watch ecchi shows but this, THIS is just such a delight to watch. Utena is such a loveable protagonist, a magical girl loving person who gets turned into a villain and has to "fight" the girls she loves. By fighting its not LMAO. I adore all the characters in this show and how fresh the writing for them is. Its beautifully animated and the finale was so much fun to watch!

Mashle S2 - Divine Visionary Arc

I picked up the first volume at the bookstore halfway through the season to try reading, after Bling-Bang-Bang-Born blew up, and I was not disappointed. Binged Season 1 and caught up in a day. There's just something so satisfying with gag humor and shounen fight scenes. I love everyone (besides for Innocent Zero, fuck that guy) and will for sure be binge reading the manga. The music, as always, is so hype and having rap for the fight scenes is very interesting. The soundtrack for S2 just released yesterday and has some amazing tracks on it.

Shangria-La Frontier

What. An. Amazing. Show. Never thought I'd like a VR Gaming anime as much as I do now, but this was just so vibrant and humorous. Sunraku's tenacity at gaming and taking on challenges, plus my love for rogue/assassin builds from DND, made him such a likeable character. The entire Weathermon fight to be slotted for 4 episodes was just..gorgeous and stunning. The Music?!? God its perfection. The NPC's of Rabitzu... to have characters and just to not be weird was very much appreciated to me. I sincerely wish it had the fandom that other Fall 2023 shows, cough cough Frieren, Undead Unluck and Apothecary Diaries, has because I just want more merch sobs. The cosplans I have for this show? Too many, and its already in production for another 2 cour season for this fall!!

The Apothecary Diaries

What a spectacular show and fabulous 24 episodes. The animation, the music (Satoru Kosaki, Kevin Pinken, Alisa Okehazma), the characters, the backgrounds?! I enjoyed watching the characters interact and loved the humor in the animation. I also just read and caught up with the manga in 2 days...so it's that good and a worthwhile watch and read!

[trickstersaint]

Screaminggg saint person I just read your apple taste in the throat as sin poem and I love it so I have a childhood experience to share bc I think the vague themes will make you writhe

So! Ever since I was a child I thought The Fruit™ was a fig! And I felt probably the same way you did whenever you ate an apple as when i ate fig newton's bc of this at like 6🤷 tasty but also [grows up in the church].

Anyway, that one lil story in the bible with the fig tree where jesus is having a very human moment and got caught in 4k withering the tree out of hanger then covered his ass with bravado+temple talk had stuck with little me from this, so to ramble: the life and death that goes into a figs growth and how even in paradise there was hunger, how it exists even among the divine, and that you have to give yourself whole to it like a fig wasp (it will kill you in the end) (or do you choose to die for it) (was there ever really a choice or is it nature to find something bigger than yourself and sacrifice your life for it) and that religion only lives on bc we do but who is to separate the temple from the tree thats barren that will outlast us like a legacy to all we could've been if not withered before its fruiting season? And what of the tiny wasps when the time comes to pollinate but the tree is gone, what of the next generation that burrowed their way out of the fig/divine and what life cycle is there to choose after? Were you born into it all or is it only where your mother died? andandand?? Screams I hope this gives you inspo for more writing or that you at least enjoyed the vibes of me being insane abt figs and what it means to take of the forbidden fruit and the withering of the fig tree lol

Also princess Diana and Gerard as a saint has been rattling around in my brain and I'm going nuts plz elaborate on what they mean to you I'm dying to hear ur thoughts in depth on that

my friend is also really into the fig tree story... beginning to think that raised-christian people only have a few preset bible concepts that they come preloaded with obsessions around. the two genders... fig and apple... anyway saying that even in paradise there was hunger is crazy. i need to write more about adam and eve they drive me insane. y'all ever think about this line from an article about adam and eve that i was reading for a research project a year ago and only posted on my main account where almost none of you guys would have seen it

she is trying desperately to encase herself within the divine framework... jack katz "The Social Psychology of Adam and Eve" save me. save me... anyway...

mmmm on princess diana and gerard way as saints. i find it interesting the way that people idolize her both as an icon of kindness and charity and also as a martyr; for the people who are really caught up in the image of her, i feel like it's absolutely as much about the fact that she died as it is about the good things that she did. not to say that people make her a christ figure lmao but if you REALLY wanted to get into it you could draw some parallels between the way that people talk about jesus interacting with the lepers and diana shaking the hand of someone with aids. and then to take this figure that you are idolizing for their selflessness and good works and to say that she was murdered is like. very evocative of martyrdom i think. these are not personal beliefs of mine i just find it very interesting to look at how people talk about her. personally i think the cultural obsessions around figures like princess diana and marilyn monroe, especially because they're women, are only ever going to grow parasocial and focus around the image or the idea of a person rather than fostering an interest in a historical figure. which. i mean. hey. me and saint sebastian for real :|

um. and then to further implicate myself in this social phenomenon. i am a freak about gerard way and i am not to be trusted around images of them in joan of arc armor or a cheerleader dress. liable to burst into tears or start speaking in tongues i think. i've been too transgender and too into my chemical romance for too long to be anything near normal about that particular person. seeing them in the joan of arc costume made me feel so crazyinsane about religion for so long that i sat down and wrote that first saints quiz. um. and you know actually i do have a poem about the way that it makes me feel so you can just go read that before i say something that's going to make me sound like i have a genuine religious fixation on that guy with like. a wife and kids. see also: trickstersaint poem "there's this feeling i get that i can't describe".

[theveryconfusedartistsart-blog]

You know, back when I wasn't really sure what to do with Frisk, trying to define them in opposition to Chara helped a lot.

If Chara is serious, then Frisk is silly

If Chara's a bit of an edgelord then Frisk is bubbly and cheerful. (Remember Frisk making a smiley face with the punchcards and Chara saying “happiness is fleeting” when you take them out.)

If Chara is impatient and tries to be as efficient as possible, then Frisk is more willing to "waste time", having fun and hanging out with their new underground friends.

(It's easy to imagine some of what Frisk can do as almost deliberate antagonism, the Narrator is harsh and cold and snobby so Frisk starts having fun trying to rile them up. I mean why else would they start checking literally everything in sight when they know the Narrator’s so impatient lol)

If Chara is strict and bossy, Frisk is perhaps a little rebellious, a little contrarian, and employs the philosophy of "you can do whatever you want forever" even if it annoys spoilsports like Chara...especially if it annoys spoilsports like Chara.

If Chara tries to be formal and polite, calm and distant, perhaps has internalised the idea that "children should be seen and not heard" from the surface, then Frisk is more rowdy, teasing and loud, but undeniably warm and friendly.

If Chara is hypervigilant and perhaps a little cowardly (with the running away text), then Frisk is the stupidly fearless one.

If I’m right about Chara not really wanting to forgive him, then that means forgiving Asriel was always Frisk’s preferred choice.

If Chara is the academically gifted one and the teacher's pet(because of the wordiness), then Frisk struggles with school and is easily bored by it and thus spends schooltime goofing off and making trouble with Flowey (or coming up with ways to skip…with Flowey).

Chara’s a voracious reader but Frisk can’t read very well at all, and they certainly don’t enjoy it, they see anything longer than a paragraph or two and check out.

Since I think that Chara is both pretty proud of both their role in the prophecy and their status as royalty (but keeping up their high self esteem is incredibly dependent on others validation lest they crash down to nothing), to me that means Frisk is much more naturally and stably self confident.

...If Chara is easily embarrassed, and cares far too much about everyone seeing them as perfect then it's Frisk who is shameless, and doesn't care what others really think... which is why they can dance in public, and flirt with strangers, and dress like a human rainbow.

And we know that Chara apparently hated the power of determination and wanted to get rid of it "that power... that's the power you were trying to stop, isn't it?" and had a save file they never used, which probably means they could have reset after the buttercup plan and saved both themselves and Asriel and just…chose not to… But Frisk, on the other hand is the most determined child in the Underground and the only one not to eventually willingly give up against Asgore (since every human could reset)

It’s because of this that I can pretend those few moments of Frisk seemingly showing annoyance with our actions is actually Chara being annoyed with Frisk. Because Frisk chooses the soda they describe as “sickly” and CHARA scrunches up their nose or Chara making Frisk drag their feet when Frisk WANTS to look at stuff in the creepy lab. It's probably Frisk telling Chara not to be such a scaredy cat in that moment. 

So yeah…defined in opposition, it helps with characterization, and works as an alternative to player theory (even if that's canon now)

(I am so sorry I sent you this lol, It's yet another text wall and it's not even Friskriel but…I like to hear your thoughts and I was talking about Kris and Red in opposition and it got me thinking)

Interesting, this is mostly how I imagined their personalities when I started writing my fanfics! I took a lot of what I got from the Pacifist route and applied it to Frisk, and took the things that Chara says around the end of the Genocide route, there a lot of clashing personality differences between them.

Although, I always thought it was Frisk digging their heels when they went through True Labs, it kinda added to my thought process of them being a softie like Papyrus and being put off by the creepy atmosphere and amalgamates, they hadn't really been in an area quite like that one before. But I can also see Chara being put off by it too at some points, and being set off by the old recordings... either way, no matter how creepy it is, I'm not sure either of them can deny their curiosities.

Unrelated, but there's also the funny thing you can do at the dump where you just keep looking at the garbage, and the Narration (Chara) gets kind of annoyed (if I remember right?) and it gave me the headcannon that Frisk (or at least my version) enjoys looking through piles of stuff/junk and thrift shopping, if they could go visit a dump on the surface, they would, it's their Weird Kid Thing.

I'm not sure if you're interested in this, but I've considered the player theory as a continuing concept in fanfiction (or specifically my fanfiction??)

Technically the player/me(the writer) becoming a watcher of the world (instead of controlling) who narrates the story as it happens... combined with the main character's POV. Like, for example, when the character drops into a panic attack- the narration will start to freak out with them.

(Alternatively, I've definitely also considered the narrator of the story also being Chara (instead of me) but without really flat out admitting it)

And I say 'watcher' specifically because I've never liked the idea of controlling the characters as if 'I'm possessing' them like a ghost, or as if they have no free will in the story, and it's why I'll never be completely comfortable with the Player theory, canon or not. (Pretty sure it's a side effect of becoming emotionally attached to the characters, oops.)

But other than that, I've tried my best to combine the game with the world I created for it my fanfics and it's become an AU that I've found myself preferring to think it about more.

I have also long ago considered, that when Asriel became Flowey, he went through many noticeable personality changes, and I realized that he likely adopted a lot of Chara's personality traits because he was trying to be strong like them. (There could also be an argument that this also happened naturally due to them sharing his body when Asriel died, Chara left a mark on him)

[the-kiarah-organisation]

Talk to me abt your system? Just any random things you wanna tell me! I love to learn about other systems!!

YES THANK YOU!! I LOVE ASKS LIKE THESE!!!

Aaa ok! Hi, I'm Amethyst, I've been here the longest so I know a little more than most people, great time to send this ask lol

Some trivia first:

The Organisation (our system) has been around for eight years!

We have "versions" of SimplyPlural. Every change to formatting, fields, chats or groups adds a version. We are on v61, which is the largest profile overall we've done!

The first member(s) (myself and my brother) formed in 2016

We have our own language and English dialect!

On a technicality, my second language is English, however, the body can't speak Kansū (the primary language of the Organisation)

Kīara'h is considered a parallel universe, not an alternative universe

Excluding Thaye (age ability), our oldest member is 40, and our youngest is 4.

There are a total of six of us who age

Our "Plural Stuff" folder (banners, avatars, dividers, etc) is over 10gb (found that one out yesterday

I get asked a lot about our communication between each other, but just because we grew up as a system, and the way we did that, it seems to be great. We don't fight, there's good communication between members. That kinda thing.

Our name, Kīara'h means Leaf. The system names we've had previously were: Room, Rom (misspelling of room), and Leaf. The name Leaf came from talking with our (ex) best friend about headspace, which they were very involved with, and needing a new name. A leaf was the first thing we saw, and it stuck.

People also are often interested in Scene (or SCN, depending on notation and who you are talking to). Scene is a type of daydreaming where the person hosting the scene has no control other than prompts they give. Scene is how we see our pasts, and find out our powers and skills. (Daydreaming is the best word I can use, it's a little hard to find one lol)

On ages: a lot of species have no age, where the souls have been around since the start of time. They have what's known as a "presenting age". This is notated by a "∞" symbol added onto their age. For example, a member without presenting age looks like: "Age » 26" and a member with, would look like: "Age » 26 - ∞".

EleWe (Elements and Weapons system), is how we assign our powers. Ten total elements, ten total weapons, one hundred choices per phase. No duplicates in the same phase. Yes, we have a database for this, lol.

We speak a language called Kansū in headspace. It's not fully translatable to English, but the stuff the body does know (from scene and from figuring it out) I can use. My most common word, apart from Kansū names, is either: Āida'h or Aīste'h, both of which font translate to English, but are a sort of friendly nickname. I also use ta'hs de'h, jo ta'hst and other words a lot. These come from the root ta'hs, which means calm.

And now, onto the lore:

The Organisation has so much lore, from the way Gods work, their divisions and all that, to the way species and animals work.

Out of the species we have in our system, most of them were created by us.

All of our own stories and backstories fit into organisation lore, such as the reason the organisation was founded was because Chroma (God Division) and Humans would bully supernaturals. Our Organisation also exists to protect Innocents.

Kīara'h is also classed as a division, with our God (we only have one who runs it, my boyfriend) Kītōne'h being ex Chroma. We have other Gods, however they are from the Oxyn Division.

Headspace stuff:

A few things here: "Old Headspace", "World : Kīara'h", "World : Human", "Social Plane", "Games Zone" and "World : Home"

Old Headspace: it's a broken down area, picture it on like the nether roof. We outgrew it too fast and moved down to the main nether (metaphorically, it's not actually the nether)

World : Kīara'h: current headspace, it's very large. Deogen was drawing maps recently, but we only got so far. World : Kīara'h has the dorms (a place for everyone to stay), a library, art rooms, writing rooms, music rooms, computer rooms, a drama studio, camping groups, an outdoor cooking van (they almost burned down the indoor one once), a river (it's called River Iris), a center square, thr Shed (front room), host offices, and access to Old Headspace, Social Plane and other worlds.

World : Human: the human world. Except this is a parallel universe. A lot of houses that people have will be here. It's pretty much this earth, but a little different, small changes to make the houses correct and stuff.

Social Plane: it's like a city, it's got a train station in the center so you can go to the hub and the Games Zone. The hub is how you get to any world. The Social Plane has shops, bars, parks, pretty much anything. It also has many Kansū people who aren't in the organisation, they run a lot of the shops.

Games Zone: our Insym runs this. It started as PHA, which is like Phasmophobia, but if you were in it. The ghosts are played by spirits we hire. It has since expanded to many other games, I haven't been in a while (working on keeping everything running) so I'm not quite sure of what is exactly there. I know there's other people who run stuff though! It's mainly Crew!PHA who work there.

World : Home: is a little different. It's, well, source worlds. World : Home refers to a collection of worlds, unlike the others mentioned before. Because we hold our own sources most of the time, it means we also have access to the worlds as they are in source.

[den-ai-d]

Ooof...a decade on this site eh?

Oh no, story time incoming!

10 years and yeah, so much has happened already. Originally, I made this blog back when I was in high school as a place to post my drawings; back then, it was all just pencil drawings on paper. Looking at them now...well it was obvious I still had a long way ahead of me LOL. And to think some people assume that everyone skilled enough in art must have had some innate talent for it. CLEARLY, they don't know what they're talking about because I was terrible at it early on!

But I mean, I didn't really think that of my art, did I?

No. In fact, I'm pretty sure that kid me was very much impressed with his own works. See, that child had a very bloated ego and a high opinion of himself. You should ask his poor friends; I'm sure they'd agree that the bugger could take a few lessons on humility with how he'd be sharing all of his silly sketches to them and pontificating on and on about how nice he thinks they are. Yeah, I was an insufferable kid.

But I do think that overinflated ego of mine turned out beneficial for my growth as an artist because without it—without my love for my own art—I wouldn't have stuck to it.

And stuck to it I did.

Went to college soon after that and took a program majoring in biology. Not much of a surprising choice since I've always liked the sciences and figured it would later on give way to a stable career; funnily enough, while I was very passionate about making art, I never thought it would be a profitable source of income. But that didn't mean I'd stop doing it on my free time though! Actually, this was when I got myself my first tablet! And what better way to start my digital drawing experience than to buy a FUCKING EXPENSIVE cintiq!!! With the extra motivation coming from the monetary pressure of such a purchase, you bet your ass I used the hell out of that thing. I was so intent on making use of it that—would you look at that—I still use it to this day! (Wow, they really made those old wacom tablets to last, didn't they?)

Obviously, college work ended up taking a lot of my time so I couldn't really draw as much as I did a few years ago. There were even times when I could only make one painting throughout a whole month; a far cry to my previous output. But even so, I never wavered in thinking that making art—being an artist—was something that was part of my identity; it was something that I always will come back to, no matter how much busy I got contending with course work.

And speaking of which, fuck that! Got my first honest-to-goodness mental breakdown because of all the studying I was doing at one point. See, I'm the type of student that likes getting good grades because BIG NUMBERS so I made it a point to be studious. To the point of insanity, apparently.

Anyway, I got better eventually and it all turned out nice. Even snagged all the awards I could've gotten for my thesis by the end of it! Yes, I am bragging. I deserve it, thank you very much! (For anyone curious, it was a study about plant pigments and using them in solar cells).

After that debacle, I found myself whisked into Adulthood which meant I finally had to find a job. Guess I was lucky since I didn't really have much of a hard experience searching for one. Got accepted into a cosmetics company for a lab position. Hmm, in hindsight, I think they just wanted a fresh graduate who wouldn't demand a high salary and that was me so I got in pretty easily. And honestly, the work was AWESOME. My job ended up with me coming up with formulas for new products. I got to make lotions, shampoos, soaps (ugh, I hated that one), perfumes, toners, balms, scented candles, and—oddly enough that one time—glue! It was a wonderful experience for me since it blended my interest in science and art with how it required me to think of creative ways of applying technical solutions in order to make products that needed to look, feel, smell, and perform a certain way.

As a bonus, I even got to make stuff for myself! I was particularly fond of making creams with menthol. The soothing chill on the skin is just so nice!

It wasn't all good though. I mean the menthol was fine and dandy, I assure you, but even if I was enjoying myself with the work, it just so happens that it just wasn't giving me enough money to provide for the family. Also, there was that one time I splashed chili oil on my eye. A very eye-opening and spicy turn of events to be sure.

With the bills stressing the hell out of me, I then thought to myself: if only I had a marketable skill that I could use in my off time as a way of engaging with a hobby whilst earning money.

Yup, I started my singing career!

LOL no. I opened art commissions for the first time!

It was a very scary experience, mind you. I don't consider myself a social butterfly and the prospect of talking with other people in a transactional context was a big reason why I haven't even considered doing it all this time. Turns out being poor and running out of money outweighed such concerns. Also, my keeping up with art and posting them online all these years seemed to have payed off well; my twitter having then recently crossed over a thousand followers which meant I had a decent pool of potential clients!

And so I bumbled through my first few commissions trying to appear professional and all put together in front of my clients while consistently shitting myself on the inside. Just like all well-functioning adults!

It was October last year when I started. I figured that I wouldn't have much in way of commissioners—what with being new to the business—and that was fine since I didn't have much time to put on them anyways since I did still had to go to work on my day job. What mattered was that it gave me enough of a financial buffer so that I didn't have to worry too much about going under.

This continued to the turn of the year where I was able to juggle both my job and doing commission without much of a hassle. In fact, I noticed that people were actually really interested in getting commissions from me. So much that at one point...I actually made more money in a month than what I would've with my monthly salary! At that point, it was so over! Like, I originally was planning to at least observe how things went within this year and then decide after if I would just keep it as a side gig or go full-time with art. Turns out I was much more impulsive than I expected.

It was on a bright sunny February morning (no cinematic storm clouds in sight, unfortunately) that I decided on a lark to approach my boss at work and tell them that yup, no joke, I was gonna be leaving. I handed my resignation letter a few days later.

I would've liked to say that it was a tearful goodbye with my cherished co-workers whom I've spent the last five years of my life with but...COME ON, I barely talked with those people! Instead, it was a lukewarm farewell between people who just happened to work in proximity to each other. Eh, like I said, I wasn't much of a social butterfly and no one really made an effort to get to know me so oh well. MOVING ON!

Actually, I couldn't just up and leave because there are laws around these kinds of things so I worked there for another month but all that was a blur. Soon enough, I was officially unemployed!

So like I mentioned earlier, I full on did not expect doing art as something that would bring in much in way of income. My parents too thought the same. They said that yeah, art was a good hobby but as job? Let's be serious here! Well, turns out we were wrong all this time. With me fully dedicated to commission work, I was able to take on a larger volume of clients. Not as many as some of you go for (I'm looking at you, people who take ten or more commissions per batch, you monsters!) but enough that I was actually making a stable living! And yeah, WAY more than my now previous job. What an absolute shock to everyone involved; me most of all.

Now it's almost the end of the year, my plans having all but shattered into tiny pieces. Tiny pieces that scatter with the wind as I look back on the past ten years that has led me to where I am today. A lot of time has passed. I graduated high school, college, then got a job. Then graduated from that too. Certain people have come and gone. Some more permanent than others. I've lost friends and made new ones. Tumblr got fucked. Twitter got fucked. The world stopped for two years. For some, it's still stuck in those two years. I made glue in a lab. Almost lost an eye in a lab. I bought chips with my very own money for the first time. I loved people. Hated them too. Things have happened. Things have changed.

I certainly am very different from that kid who was having troubles fitting in with others from his class, what with being bullied and suffering through a particularly angsty teenage (oh my god I was CRINGE). A kid who often sought drawing as an escape to all of those terrible things out of his control.

I guess I'm happy I can still relate to that kid.

[fizzingwizard]

joking with bf about tumblr and realized I don't understand what people get out of social media anymore - like at all.

My first real "social media" was myspace. It was short-lived. But I liked that (back then) you had your own page, you filled it out with your information, you had your music and banners etc. Not so many images back then, but the point was your page was yours. Customizing your own space was fun.

Then I moved on to livejournal which was even more self-involved. You had your journal that was just yours. You could put anything in it, anything you wanted, and it wouldn't go away unless you chose to delete it. But other people could look at it and interact with you in the comments. And you could join communities where you'd meet other people with similar interests, which would then lead them to visit your journal and you to visit them.

When lj tanked I moved to tumblr, where once again, I have my own space, I can talk about whatever I want, people can choose to interact with me if they feel like it, plus there are visuals and video and a feed which delivers new posts from people I follow. It's easier than ever to just explore, meet people with similar interests, and make connections, while cultivating my own journal/scrapbook that is a record of myself over the years.

It seems to me that self-involved element just isn't interesting to many people anymore. Even though Instagram and Tiktok are definitely very invested in the self! I guess the argument is probably that no one reads text posts anyway, the best way is to post video or images and at most have a short quick to read blurb attached at the bottom. But the attraction of text posts, for me, was never the idea that other people were going to read them. It was simply self-expression. The enjoyment of talking about what's going on with me and working through it. It's nice to get comments, but sometimes the comments, well, make you feel worse, especially on a personal post.

On fandom posts I hoped for notes, but in general I liked to stew in anonymity. I thought about having separate blogs for fandom posts and personal ones. But you know why I didn't? Because I like going to someone's blog and seeing more there than just their art or fanfiction. I like knowing a thing or two about their lives. Not so I can judge them. Because it makes them feel real, relatable, like a friend. Someone I'm not meant to worship for their skill, but appreciate and support, by my own choice, as part of a community. When there's no info at all and it's just a fandom blog, it feels commercial to me. I'm always relieved when a fandom blog links to their personal blog, although I also find that much more jarring than if everything's just in one place and searchable by tags.

These days everyone tells me to be on Discord, Tiktok, or Instagram. But in none of those places can I develop my own personal space the way I like to. I can't even find groups with similar interests on them. Maybe some exist, but if they do they're nowhere near as easy to find as they used to be. When I was in my twenties I could always find people to chill with, no matter how tiny the fandom was. Now the point is to have a sleek, clean, specific persona so people know immediately what you're selling (even when no actual money is involved). You're selling art, you're selling fanfiction, you're selling meta, you're selling activism, you're selling witticisms. That's all great. And what we've all known, even since the days of myspace, is that what doesn't sell is personal posts. Talk about yourself = followers walk away. There's nothing for them here. Multi-fandom blog? Yeah but I only like one fandom you do, so clearly we have nothing in common and shouldn't interact. Lol. Honestly there are so many people here on tumblr I'd like to interact with, except when I visit their blogs they seem like they wouldn't want to interact with me. I'm only a little bit cottagecore, not 100% cottagecore. I sometimes post about books, but sometimes about anime. So the book-lovers who stick up their nose at anime don't want to hang out with me, and the anime-lovers who don't get classical literature maybe think I'm gonna be a snob toward them. Because they know "too much" about me. If they knew less, if they knew only what they'd feel comfortable knowing, because my blog is anime-only or something, then maybe we'd be friends. Not that I'd call that friendship :) but you know, in that shallow, hyper-specific social media sense of the word.

That's my theory. I never was popular on any social media site - personal blogs rarely are! Never wanted to be either (I've been here since I was in college and uhhh absolutely do not judge me please by anything I wrote when I was stupid nineteen). And it may be that very personal feature of tumblr which makes it less attractive to people than places where the point is to be a persona, instead of a person. Persona attracts, person not so much.

I just feel sad that this type of social media seems to be disappearing when I have no appreciation for the type that's replaced it. Believe it or not, I want to see y'all's novel-length text posts. Even when I don't read them, I still want to see them. I like having my little group that I follow and the only people I unfollow are blogs which self-promote more than I have a taste for. Small spaces are so underrated and I guess that's only to be expected.

[multifanlol]

Could you do some romantic Yandere Marcy Headcanons?

Okay so first off-thanks for the request! And second of all, i love her smm and yandere her would def make me question my life choices lol anyways….

Tw: Stalking, obsessive behaviours, overbearing behaviours, just regular yandere stuff….

Marcy would be clingy

Like not the clingy clingy the very overbearing one of your personal space type my girl would not know what personal space is 💀

Like let’s say you were going to give some letter to a teacher-

Marcy would offer to come with you! No saying no she very much insists

I can see her doing the basics like stealing your used pen, taking locks of your hair, etc stuff that you wouldn’t be too sad about

And if she did take stuff that would bother you she would play the hero character and give it back to you!

“Oh found your phone by the table s/o heh, you should really be more careful with your stuff!”

While i don’t think she’d have a big hero complex like Anne and Sasha due to her insane clumsiness she’d like the idea of it though, like yk those movies she probably watches with the dashing hero and there love interest, she would always tell you that and probably force you to watch the movies with her-

Speaking of her insane clumsiness i feel like that would stop you if you ever did from suspecting her stalking behaviour, because she’s Marcy Wu the clumsiest girl you’ve ever known since kindergarten!

But believe me she can stalk, in more different ways per say like if you had social media she’d probably be using her own account or an unknown account but to be fair she wouldn’t wanna creep you out!

So probably her own account to monitor you at best, no she’s not controlling you, she’s just watching over you! She has to make sure you don’t do anything stupid after all!

Overall, she’s be harmless before Amphibia of course…..

Now i wouldn’t say she’s Sashas level of manipulation but we have to remember she got her best friends stranded in Amphibia a pretty deadly world you could easily die in making one wrong move and did a pretty good job still lying about it

She’s more of a gaslighter type of manipulator maybe guilt trips you anyways back to her in Amphibia-

The first thing she wants in Amphibia other then the cool adventures is looking for you, and oh boy would she be training, she’s a ranger now she can protect you like she always wanted! Now it could go two ways

If you changed like she did and got more stronger, she wouldn’t know how to feel, sure she’d try to tell herself she’s happy but how’s she supposed to protect you if you don’t want her to? Maybe she has to be a little forceful but it’ll all work out in the end don’t worry! She’s sure you’ll be hers by the end

She’s sure of it……

But if you didn’t change and we’re still “weak” in her eyes, she would do anything in her power to protect you! It would honestly be how Anne saw her-

Now she’s not clumsy and can protect you at all costs, now that you are in Amphibia i feel like it’d be more easy to now see through her, since her clumsiness mostly made up for her being creepy and oh boy you wouldn’t like it

You’d notice how possessive she’d probably get again, she wouldn’t want to be forceful, but what if you die?! Especially since she is yk the reason your there, not like you need to know though, she feels like you would understand but what if Anne or Sasha talked you into it that what she did wasn’t okay?!

Her jealousy would show almost clearly when interacting with Sasha or Anne, especially Anne since she said it herself she was jealous of Anne especially with how likeable Anne can be……she’s just a clumsy nerd after all….

Or well she was

Would probably try to to impress you with her smartness and stuff 😭

“You don’t think you can solve these huh, Anne? Woah these stuff are really easy!”

“Those look really hard though-“

When King Andries offers her that deal, how could she say no?! I mean if her parents moved she’d lose everything…..she’d lose you…..

And to her your her escapism, like a fictional character you’d wish was real different is you are real….

So this is for her and your own good…..

When King Andries outs the truth to you all she expects you to understand

Why are you backing away from her like the others…..

I did this for us s/o! T-They were gonna tear us apart!

……

Let’s say you were with Sasha and wartwood training, you didn’t know how to feel about Marcy as a what she did was messed up, but you end up coming to the conclusion on hearing her out, with the other girls there of course……

While you were doing this Marcy was being held captured ready for the core to be the new host for the body, what the core nor king Andries knew was that this was a girl with a certain strong obsession towards someone……

While the core isn’t obsessed as much as they try to stop it Marcy’s “love” for you ends up reaching Darcy who’s a smart manipulative psychopathic strategist……

Yeah

The first thing Darcy wants is for you to be found and be captured immediately

Sasha notices how different the bots are acting…..like they aren’t trying to attack her when they see her…..they seem to have eyes on you…..

Sasha thinks that King Andries is probably trying to capture you while she doesn’t know why she knows it has something to do with Marcy

I mean she’s kinda right

Anywayssss if Darcy does capture you your screwed, like very screwed

Your dealing with a smart obsessed mastermind who also happens to have the core hosting the mind therefore makes it Psychotic

Why don’t you just call “it” Darcy

With Darcy’s psychotic and obsessed personality it would be no lie Darcy would be forceful

“Heh! Oh “sweetie” you thought you could escape from me?! There will be no earth after we’re finished so why don’t you just be a cute thing and listen….”

I feel like King Andries would feel guilty and would always try to make it being captured by “Darcy” a little better by trying to tell Darcy letting you roam around the castle as it’s not like you can escape since the castle is in the air

Not like she’d listen that much but he’d try

Expect a very overbearing, forceful, clingy “girlfriend” i mean your practically hers at this point nobody could ever love you like she does!

Expect all those lovey dovey cheesy nicknames like “cupcake” “sweetie” yk the usual she’d say this while with the psychotic, most sinister look on her face it’d be kinda scary…..

Even when Anne does save the world and you four can all return safely not everyone is happy

Particularly a short blue haired girl

She still has to move, no matter how much she begs she wouldn’t care at that point she wasn’t losing you

Maybe she has to make a few lies to the new job application place you might say she couldn’t but she’s grown so much in Amphibia i think she’s sure she’s capable if it doesn’t work though logically she’ll maybe start with your parents then depends if there divorced or not, maybe convince them how cool the place is….and if none works

Well I’ll let you decide 🙂

Overall Marcy i feel like would be a bit that obvious yandere although if you just look a little deeper you’ll realise how different she’d look…..

I feel like there’s more stuff she’d do but this is all i could come up with for now-

[mousemannation]

How did you get into fashion and what things do you want to design for like. Your career?

thank u for this question!!! hmm, when i was in primary school i did a little sewing with a friend's mum, and also my mum had to sew my costumes for my dance class end of year concert; so there's been sewing around me my whole life. We had a sewing class in year 7 too where I tie dyed and embroidered a pillow. I didn't take sewing elective though.

I properly started to get into it once I started watching historical sewing youtubers! People like Bernadette Banner, Morgan Donner, Bella Mae etc etc. I just found it so fascinating seeing the whole process of making clothes.

I also really enjoy cosplay and early on in my sewing journey my friend asked to do a Wicked the Musical joint cosplay as Elphaba and Glinda. My Elphaba dress remains my biggest ever sewing project despite technically being my first??? (technically bc I first wore it in 2020 after a year of making it but I've worked on it in the years since).

I'll also say, as someone who's always had issues with body image and gender, being able to make my own clothes massively helped me become more confident.

Gosh I keep having more points ejiejejej the next one is that I'm really invested in environmentalism and the fashion industry is one of the biggest polluters. Between overconsumption, overproduction, unsustainable materials AND massive issues with slavery there is a LOT of change that needs to happen within the industry. Some of that happens with the general public, a lot of it must happen from the inside, and if I can be a part of that I would love it.

On to the second part of ur question (finally) well the real answer is I don't know kwkeksksksk. After I finished my certificate in fashion I had the choice to pursue a diploma in fashion (think commercial production, designing for brands, focus on clothing that gets reproduced and sold in large numbers) or in costume (specifically for live production like TV and film, theatre, ballet, dance). I didn't much enjoy the commercial side of fashion, stuff like sourcing materials in bulk, creating and organising patterns to maximise number of garments made- so I decided I'd prefer to do costume. I find the idea of creating one off garments to represent a character, using fashion to enhance a narrative really really enticing.

Do I really believe I want to pursue costume design as a career? I don't know. That question is a little more difficult for me since my disability has prevented me from getting a job. I don't have any working experience and already my job prospects are on shaky ground. The idea of having people rely on my is scary... but I don't think I'd be totally opposed. I'd probably prefer to work in theatre out of the options. Ballet is far too serious i could not handle the pressure, and I don't really like sewing other styles of dance costumes (like leotards or kind of anything Lycra lol). If I can find a local theatre company that's relatively low-pressure that could be fun.

I do also like the idea of making clothes on a small scale. One offs or small batch that I would sell locally. I enjoy the freedom of just letting myself create without restraints! Starting without an end goal!

I am STILL yapping but my final point is i have so many interests that i don't think I'll ever settle into one career. Even if i did get a job making costumes I'd almost certainly still be pursuing other things at the same time. It's a long term goal of mine to (eventually) go to university and get a degree in pure mathematics!!! I also want to do exchange at some point, find some three month program and go kskskwk. I want to travel, i want to write poems and books and songs, I want to draw more, paint more, learn to sculpt! I have always been a very ambitious person and this is not at all what u asked about so I will leave it here 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[this-is-chaos-magick]

https://www.tumblr.com/this-is-chaos-magick/761040354318368768/httpswwwtumblrcomthis-is-chaos-magick7609472

I agree with all of this pretty whole heartedly (except for the Marvel hates her part, I just think screenwriters for the studio don’t know how to write her because of how much the comics writer truly despise Wanda as a character. House of M sucks and you’ve been dooped lol). But to your point of Wanda trying to find help, and find people who will still accept her (which definitely makes the monumental task of changing easier), and I’ve always thought that the X-Men would be pretty perfect for that part of her story.

I say this because the X-Men are very well known for some of their members having done some extremely awful things (for some of them, worse than what Wanda did in MoM), but the thing about those members is the fact that they’re not only trying to be better and redeem themselves, but in some way have a found a pseudo family or found some form of relationship where they feel seen and aren’t alone. With Wanda, I always think of Rogue, someone who was raised as a rather villainous force, who joined the X-Men, and hasn’t felt like a good person, but she still tries, and is never alone, and I think that’s something Wanda needs at this point. More than reuniting with Vision or finding her kids, it’s finding a good, stable support system, one that’ll encourage her to do better and get therapy, have empathy for her and her past, and just generally give her a safe space to be seen and fuck up.

I’m sorry for the rant, I know it’s also extremely X-Men pilled, so my bad. But I genuinely want Wanda to be treated with empathy from people who will see her for who she is.

Hey sorry again for the late reply,

I was being sarcastic (is that the right word😭) on the mcu hating Wanda thingy, it's like a running joke eversince dsmom... since they keep making her suffer :(

I agree with ur comment about Wanda being with the mcu X-Men but I don't think X-Men is coming to the mcu soon, it seems Feige keep dilly dollying about them (and also....I don't think x men fans would want mcu Wanda's character to be with them...and the discourse would be annoying) mcu writing kind of sucks right now...and let's be realistic .....Wanda is mostly likely gonna come in the next avengers movie as a shock value and probably...oh god probably gonna be captured by RDJ's doom or some annoying shit like that...and I hate the fact that's mostly like is gonna happen...💀[annoyed screaming] Since mcu knows how to disappoint us with always making the worst choice possible

Okay enough with negativity let me be positive, 🙏

With Agatha all along releasing...and her having a coven, if Wanda returns... somewhere in the future I am hoping for her to be with Agatha and her friends...I know Wanda and Agatha have issues with each other, but them both being free of the darkhold influ...maybe they will understand each other, try to forgive each other and then be friends and then mentor her? I want Wanda to learn more about magic I am upset that Wanda literally just got into magic in the mcu and they killed her quickly...:((((( we really need a scarlet witch movie, tbh I don't think Wanda actually died in the dsmom even tho I always makes a post about it (I am dramatic ass hell) you know since the witches road is getting used in Agatha,

you know I have a idea for a scarlet witch movie

its mixing the original writing from mcu writers ( Jac Schaeffer save us) and a bit of Scarlet witch (1994) storyline, trust me I already think this through it could work with the right writer and director [I'll make a separate post why I think so let me just edit it in the drafts if anybody is interested] also gives Wanda a villains to fight that could work with her mcu storyline

[mischas]

Marissa’s my number one girl forever and I also feel like Zach’s character, which I enjoyed up until 2x16, got shafted for the sake of comedy, so I’m totally delighted by the concept of Marissa/Zach. Elaborate on them if you can?

He absolutely did, and it's a shame. He's not the most fleshed out guy (are any on this show...) but Michael works so well off of Adam and the way Zach has the potential to pick at Seth's very specific wounds hits me in a way that few Seth-related things do past early s1. They don't do much with it, but I like what we get to see of it. Like Neil taking to Zach immediately at the club. That is so gutting!

I will probably never write it, but I like imagining Marissa falling into Zach post-Johnny or sometime during a college break. Obviously I detest the notion that Marissa is only attracted to chaos or who will piss off her mother. Like theeeee most reductive character writing ever it makes me want to scream. Sure she's attracted to chaos (she is not the only one!!!!) but she's mostly attracted to fishes out of water because that's how she herself feels. However, she also dated Luke for many years, and Luke was that cookie cutter Newport archetype. I like imagining Marissa seeking companionship post-Johnny (she's actually seeking companionship during the Johnny fiasco which says more about her boyfriend/friends than it does her imo but I digress). And I wish s2 would've told us how Zach navigates Newport. He plays water polo AND he's pretty open about his nerdier interests. He's pretty open with his heart to a girl that's only half interested. I think so much could've been said about the status of the Newpsies through him if they'd just put in the effort since they chucked Luke out of town.

I've always wanted to see Marissa paired with a normal bloke. Just good intentions and vibes and nothing for the narrative to tell us she loves chaos and misery or whatever the fuck. Even Alex, though I love Malex, is postured as Marissa pursuing a party lifestyle to directly piss off her mother. It's ridiculous. They are always trying to tell some sort of rubbish story about Marissa's character through her romantic choices and it's maddening. Just let the girl date!

So with Zach I think she'd love his emotional honesty and be charmed at the concerted efforts he puts in to understand her and help her navigate the complexities life always throws her. We don't know a ton about him, but he's the opposite of the intensity she has with Ryan that always bowls her over. Obviously I love RM and I think they end up together in every universe but I do think it would take years and effort on both sides to unravel the shit that happened to them individually and together as teens. So much of the show is them slowly working toward that finish line imo. The whole point is they're supposed to wade through shit to get to the other side of it. And to me, Marissa dating someone like Zach for however long, maybe years, would help get her there. Not to say I want Zach as another cog in the Core Four MachineTM but like... oh well. I also envision Zach having a fun but tense working relationship with Seth over the years. And separately from that I love the idea of Seth being good friends with one of Marissa's boyfriends. It's so warmie. It's why I wrote that into my last fic. Because at the end of the day I also see Seth/Marissa as platonic soulmates, lol.

[pan-de-queer]

20 Questions Game

Tagged by @jadedloverart! for once, i've finished work early and am free to write fic and answer tag games today hahaha thanks for the tag!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

31 lmao, feeling a lil fandom old or whatever haha

2. Total AO3 word count

157,459 ??? wild considering i mostly post one-shots hahaha

3. Fandoms you write for

for the past few years it's been supercorp but you can also find bechloe, junksen/embry, some choices (the cyoa game), and les mis sprinkled in my ao3. all wlw too

4. Top 5 fics by kudos -

ruined nights make for perfect first dates (bechloe)

'cause you know all of my secrets (supercorp)

maybe i matter (because i knew you) (bechloe)

love tastes like spring and blood (bechloe)

kept my face to the sun (you drive away my shadows) (supercorp)

most interesting thing for me abt this is that ruined nights is the shortest one out of all five of these??? love that ppl liked it so much tho

5. Do you respond to comments?

as much as possible yeah! which reminds me that i haven't replied to @jadedloverart's comment on my fic. and other comments. i should do that hahaha

6. Fic w/ Angstiest Ending -

i don't end with angst haha i'm angst with a happy ending or bust lmao BUT the closest to angst would probably be love tastes bc the issue isn't solved until the very end

7. Happiest ending? -

all of them 💕 but if i had to choose then probabbbly cause you know

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not that i'm aware of!

9. Do you write smut/what kind?

nope! never been interested in writing it mostly bc my brain sees it as "action with even more emotions" and i have a hard enough time with action as it is lol

10. Do you write crossovers?

used to! and if you count the mcu+comics!marvel crossover i only posted a tidbit of, then yes, i still do

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

again, not that i know of

12. Ever had a fic translated?

yeah! can't remember for what tho but someone very kindly asked and i said ofc!! and then they sent the link but i can't remember where lmao

13. Ever cowritten a fic?

a long long time ago haha, wouldn't be opposed to doing it again though!

14. Favorite ship?

it's been supercorp since the pandemic! but who knows where the winds of my silly lil whims might take me?

15. A wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

all of them 💕 lmao jk jk but seriously i have a LOT of wips and i put them all under ONE file so it's like wading through a garbage dump trying to see what i'll do next and that's just for supercorp, i have separate untouched wips for allll my other old fandoms too lmao (some wips i doubt i'll ever finish for sc though are the undercover fake lovers one, the coastal cleanup one even though it SHOULD be easy in theory, the hanahaki au that's lena's version instead of kara's, and the one based off of emily the song by jeremy zucker)

16. Writing strengths?

anything descriptive! i can go in depth about shit forevveeerrrr

17. Writing weaknesses?

dialogue. like i can WRITE it and i can even write it WELL but that dialogue came from the bloodbath of thousands of drafts so

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in a different language?

many thoughts! number one being that if you don't know it, get someone who's above average fluent to help you if you feel like the language is needed in the story! and if the language is fake (like using kryptonian) then make the inclusion of it make sense! other thoughts are for my thinking only 💕 (and my unfortunate friends who have to listen to me lecture)

19. First Fandom you wrote for?

MAYBE ranger's apprentice or percy jackson

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

i can't pick favorite for my babies but i'm hella proud of all my supercorp fics rn! it had been so long since i joined a new fandom that i felt suuupppeerrr awkward posting at first! but it's been a nice experience shifting fandoms ever since :)))

for the no pressure tags! @nostradamus0 @sssammich @ridiculously-over-obsessed @tiny-maus-boots and anyone else who wants to join!

[aimfor-theheart]

im not the anon from that previous jjk ask but i'd be super interested to hear ur thoughts about why jjk isn't a tragedy. i've always thought it myself too- like i'd see people say a lot of the writing decisions were made to show the "tragedy" of the story, but i've never really felt that? yeah it would be really sad, maybe even a little tragic, but i kinda felt like that wasn't necessarily the intention behind it. like it would feel tragic but more as a... side effect (?) of the writing choice rather than a deliberate decision to make a tragedy, which results in just a lack of completeness (esp for the characters that are haphazardly killed off). very sorry if this makes no sense at all LOL i'm a bit scatterbrained at the moment- hopefully u can understand a bit of what im trying to say 😭

i’m answering this late i’m sorry!! i’ve been behind on my ask box among other things!!

i’ll detail more of my answer under the cut but the tldr version is tragedy, in writing/storytelling, is it’s own genre with its own set of machinations and workings and is not just “a sad story.” at moments, which i’ll detail below, jjk does it well. but overall, falls short to me and would then be a poorly written tragedy, if it is one at all. also want to be clear that this is mostly in response to the fandom’s assertion that jjk is a tragedy—akutami has never claimed this (to my knowledge) and i’m not coming for them/these thoughts are not directed at akutami or even jjk but the fandom.

also want to say these are just my thoughts as someone with an education in literary analysis, media analysis, and specifically tragedy. i am very passionate about tragedies, since i read, consume, and analyze them as well as embody them on a stage and with my own voice. but it’s also just opinions that you can disagree with or question or be unsure of! i encourage it actually.

now, let’s get into it.

tragedies are about the downfall of a main character, to put it bluntly. usually, our main character has a fatal flaw—or there is a moment, a decision made, that is fatal and sets the whole tragedy into motion.

and more than that and perhaps more importantly, tragedies are warnings.

tragedies show us a sympathetic main character who has too much ambition, or desire for power, or recklessness, or ego, or some other fatal, massive flaw that kick starts everything and brings the tragedy down upon the story.

i think gojo’s story is a tragedy and it’s a good tragedy. if gojo were our sole main character, jjk would be a great tragedy. and you can decide what his fatal flaw is—could he not let go of his best friend/the past? so he didn’t burn getou’s body, which made him become kenjaku? did he give up being true to himself and rather became the god that the sorcerer world wanted of him? therefore ascending to kill toji, which sets off its own set of consequences? there are likely countless answers.

and then the warnings are countless, too. don’t cling to the past, put your love to rest. stay true to who you are, not what the world wants of you. etc. etc. that’s a good tragedy.

but he’s not our main character. yuuji is. and gojo’s story is the precursor to yuuji’s. usually, when a tragedy comes before another story as a prequel for context (unless dealing with something akin to the revenge plays or stories similar), it is usually so the current story can break out of the cycles of tragedy. again, not always the case, but in this one, with yuuji as our main character, it seems to have been set up that way.

especially with yuuji as our main character. actually, jjk would make a poor tragedy because of yuuji specifically as our main character.

this isn’t to say that yuuji doesn’t have flaws—but what is his fatal flaw in a tragic sense?

wanting to help others? wanting to save them? if jjk is a tragedy and therefore yuuji is our tragic main character, then there is a lesson in yuuji.

what is it? not to be kind? not to help people? not to pursue a world where people can live peacefully? is the moral of the story then that peace can never happen, so you shouldn’t try at all? not to try to break the tragic cycles already established?

what a dismal warning. what a childish, angsty point to your story. if it is a tragedy like this and you want to assert that, then perhaps it just isn’t my cup of tea.

if you want an example of a tragedy in anime that i think is done rather well, despite my copious other issues with this piece of media, attack on titan is a good example. eren is an excellent example of a tragic hero. a hero with a fatal flaw, who damns himself and the story, with plenty of warnings to boot.

obviously tragedy doesn’t have to follow this rigid of an example and there will be tragedies that subvert expectations or use the genre to flip it on its head—but i don’t think jjk has done that, nor done it well, if it can be considered a tragedy as a whole at all, so i just disagree with the parts of the fandom saying its a tragedy.

all this to say, sometimes i think fandom uses words without knowing their full meaning. tragedies aren’t just sad stories with an unhappy ending or pyrrhic victory. it has its own inner workings, archetypes, stereotypes, etc etc.

thank you for asking and sharing your thoughts!! i think all this to say i agree with you!! hope you’re doing well <33

[quillyfied]

Hellaverse Theories: Helluva Boss S1E1 and S1E2

Welcome to Quilly’s Hellaverse Theories, where I overthink the entire Hellaverse! Going this time into Helluva Boss, which shouldn’t be as long as my Hazbin Hotel analyses so I’ll probably be putting two episodes into each post, because HB is very much more about the interpersonal drama and setting than about HH’s cosmic-scale conflicts. However, HB does provide some very interesting context for HH, if they still exist in the same universe, and also interpersonal stuff is fun, so we’ll see how it goes. (Plus—trailer for the second half of season 2 means speculation! Whee! Obviously spoilers for that are here!)

(Also disclaimer that I’m not going through the rigamarole of finding that special slashed-O character so I’m spelling his name Blitzo and we all know the O is silent now, right? Right.)

Starting with Helluva Boss s1e1:

So one of my good friends got me into Hazbin Hotel, but she didn’t mention Helluva Boss to me because she didn’t think I would like it. She was almost right. I liked the style, the characters were fun, but the constant slapstick violence and edgy humor were really off-putting (as in, if that’s all the show was going to be, it wasn’t for me). It wasn’t until episode 5 that I stopped actively wanting to click away (Blitzo/Striker/Moxxie fight was real good okay), and episode 6 got me hooked like a very stupid fish (CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT). However, there’s still a lot to chew on in these early episodes.

Like the alarm lights under Blitzo’s desk. One of them says “client giving birth” and I am DESPERATE to know the story behind that one (or, like, read the fanfic inspired by it). Another says “ghost” (which, given that they’re in Hell, is hysterical, but also…season 2.5, Blitzo and Millie appear to investigate a haunted house. What is their policy on ghosts, exactly?). The rest seem pretty standard to me. Yes, even the “Stolas” one.

One of the things about this show (and Hazbin but let’s stick with where we’re at) that makes me particularly feral is all the background details. For instance: the very subtle signs that Martha and her family aren’t quite right. Lots of guns in the background, subtle bone décor, a literal child’s head mounted on the wall. Classic. Love that human spine lamp, Martha, do you have an Etsy?

Moxxie making little dog noises as his imp sounds is forever the cutest thing actually. Kinda wish I knew what it was that makes Millie’s chittering sounds, because she is equally adorable, just more unrecognizable.

Hazbin Hotel sometimes makes one question why children end up in Hell. Helluva Boss is here to say, “This. This is why. This is why kids end up in Hell sometimes.” Though there is still a huge question of nature vs. nurture in that argument (plus, y’know, since nobody knows what gets a soul into Heaven, they don’t know what gets a soul into Hell, either, but I digress).

This introduction to Stolas (for those of us who didn’t watch the pilot first) definitely shows a different sort of person than the Stolas we get later, which seems to be a favorite thing of Viv’s to do and a thing I’d be more upset about if it wasn’t so effective. Having watched so many times now, I’m starting to finally pick up on the music choices, and hearing Stolas’ song even this early really changes the tone of things, knowing the lyrics that get applied to it later (lol let’s watch Stolas set up the very thing that causes him so much grief later, this won’t end badly and my heart isn’t currently breaking at all).

Alright, diverting to Cosmic Plot for a bit: there are a lot of twig shapes hanging in the trees that look like eyes, and the beam that Millie and Blitzo are tied to has root and eye motifs carved into it. Martha invokes Satan first (in saying they’re going to return his filthy creatures, which is sort of correct, if the lore that imps descend from/were created by Satan is still true), but then says, “may the Root of Evil be honored as we continue thy work.” So, uh. Hey, Roo, the underlying Big Bad of the entire Hellaverse probably, nice to see the roots (pun really not intended, in fact done everything to be avoided, but no other word works dammit) of it being laid out early and in a way that rewards multiple viewings.

Speaking of multiple viewings: Blitzo pulling Moxxie close and threatening him with “if you ever pull a stunt like this again, I’ll fuck you AND your wife” really loses its teeth when you consider how much Blitzo loves insinuating himself into their lives and would be on cloud nine if they agreed to a threesome :P just. Blitzo there’s better ways to proposition people. Come on. “Jelly sandwiches all night” THERE’S a proposition, that’s how it’s done XD (gosh if they ever release the uncut version of whatever the heck Bryce was saying in the booth I think we’ll all pass away)

Moxxie electing to call the cops on Ralph (and subsequently get all three of them torpedo’d straight down to Hell anyway) is a strange choice, knowing he was raised in a mafia family, but even stranger is him thinking that the human authorities would deal with them fairly. Really drives home that despite their proximity, creatures of Hell really don’t get how Earth works. Or that Moxxie is a cream puff. Either way—

Y’know. I really, REALLY wonder how IMP doesn’t come under fire more from previous targets who wind up in Hell, and I am REALLY looking forward to the episode where it finally happens (sidenote to wonder if Martha and her family wound up in Hell at all, or…wherever Roo is).

On to Episode 2!

After introducing Stolas the way they did (aka as an aloof noble with a crush on Blitzo who is really condescending and also horny), the best thing they could possibly do was show that he’s a doting (if increasingly out of touch) father in a rancid marriage. Like. How dare you take this silly little guy and give him real feelings and real problems. How DARE you.

Which all gets worse if you consider how YOUNG Stolas was when he became a father; people calling him middle-aged have it wrong. Thirty-five at least is NOT middle-aged. That is a man still in his prime, not counting the fact that he’s an immortal demon prince. He’s practically a BABY. He had to have been not quite twenty by the time Via was laid and hatched, and HE LOVES HIS LITTLE GIRL SO MUCH—

(Also, the term for a young owl is “owlet,” but then I saw Bryce Pinkham spell it “owlette” in an Instagram post and now I understand where the different spellings in fanfic come from now. It’s more endearing knowing the voice actor is doing it. Even if it’s still wrong :P unless the script is deliberately going for “owlette” as in a female owl; even more permissible, if still annoying.)

“Now all my stories have been told except for one.” Okay. Okay. Hang on a second. Just gotta—hang on a second here. Stolas’ lullaby is a little morbid alongside it being sweet, because he’s essentially telling his daughter “even if I’m dead, you’ll be okay,” which has. So many layers to unpack. Helluva Boss seems to have as one of its major themes self-hatred and the ways it fucks up not only the person who has it, but their relationships, too. Stolas has zero self-worth, or very close to it. Telling his daughter that it doesn’t matter what happens to him is training her for her future as his precautionary heir—because her Goetia-given purpose in life is to take over his duties in case of his death—but it’s also him saying “I’m not that important, you’ll be alright without me.” Which is NOT his call to make. It’s also very sad that he says all of his stories have already been told but one—the story of his death—when he can’t be more than twenty-five at most (trying to do math, which is not one of my strong suits—if we assume 10 was when he met Blitzo, then 25 years later reconnected at 35, and Via is 17 when he’s 35…he would have had to have had her at 18…and if she’s no more than 5 or 6 in this sequence…he would be…23, oh my WORD). I’ve been suicidal and depressed at twenty-three, but I didn’t have a kid and a loveless marriage during it; I can only imagine the necessity of his Happy Pills, to be at the very beginning of a long eternal life and looking at it all with such desolation.

There’s such desperate hope in the lullaby, too; Stolas thinks it’s all over for him, and one day it’ll be over for all of creation, but despite it all, his little girl is still going to be okay. He’s in tears at the sight of her falling asleep thanks to his comforting. He loves her so much. He wants her to be okay when he isn’t anymore. And while that’s sweet, it’s also coming back to bite him in later seasons, because she ISN’T okay and HE isn’t okay either; his attempts to find himself and chase what he wants are the asteroid breaking up under their feet, only he isn’t holding her safe and close this time. Not for lack of trying, but it’s hard to be there for a struggling kid when you yourself are struggling—and worse, when his struggling is what is causing her to struggle too. I think Octavia appreciates the sentiment that he believes she’ll be okay, but what she NEEDS is for him to fight for them BOTH to be okay, and to know that she’s worth being okay for (“being okay” being the metaphor for “living” in this case).

And then cut from this tender scene to Octavia’s new normal: parents screaming, the cracks in their marriage becoming full-on breaks, and Stolas’ obliviousness and new obsession coming in to drag her away to a place she didn’t even really enjoy as a kid, it seems.

(The timeline of this seems weird; in the first episode, Stolas says it’s been quite some time that Blitzo’s been using the book, but this particular fight between Stella and Stolas appears to be fresh, the morning after the first time Stolas and Blitzo sleep together. Unless it’s been months and Stella is still raging like it’s only been hours, which is plausible for her, but I don’t see Stolas continuing to rehash the same steps of that argument like that. Maybe just some writing inconsistencies. I can live with it.)

Sidenote to say I need a Blitzo and Octavia bonding episode like I need air (and I KNOW what Brandon Rogers has said about Octavia and I genuinely don’t know if he was serious or not but he can SUCK IT UP).

“I’ll pay you~!” “Pay me what?” “Money~!” That might be the first time I’ve ever really heard the tildes in someone else’s voice XD Their HEIGHT DIFFERENCE, good GRIEF.

Also, Moxxie’s catchphrase. It’s adorable. It’s so incongruous with the setting. Why does he say that? Will we ever know?

LOL Fizzarolli appearing this early was something I completely forgot my first go-round. It makes me wonder if that particular Fizzbot is different from the others, because it seems to have way more personality and memories. (And can we spare a moment of sadness for knowing that around a decade ago this is where Blitzo was working, still as a clown, as close to Fizz as he could get while still stroking his massive self-hatred? LOL)

Man, the amount of references shoved in here that can only really be appreciated later—Mammon’s Loo Loo Land, Fizzbot shipped from Big Ozzie’s Factory, the fact that he calls them implings, which is only something I’ve ever heard Mammon say—GOLDEN.

I also want that Thing, Millie.

Stolas’ sense of humor turning out weird and kinda dark in a way that means he finds Blitzo trying to be funny actually humorous makes a weird amount of sense, for how sheltered and stifled he was.

“Looks like the kiddies are still running away from you” paired with Verosika’s “and I should have known you’d be here when I heard the Amber Alerts” has a synergy that I don’t know that I’m prepared to examine, actually. The soft-hearted sucker in me thinks maybe Blitzo has a soft spot for kids that his exes (and the robot version of his former best friend) have been poking at for so long it’s gone callused, which could be supported by his choice to adopt Loona and his desperation for any kind of family or connection, but. Idk. This show does go some really skeevy places with its humor sometimes that isn’t really meant to be more than skin-deep.

“Does anybody love you, BlitzO?” “No. But I’m really good with guns now” THAT’S IT THAT’S THE SHOW IT’S NOT GETTING ANY DEEPER I’M NOT WEEPING OVER BLITZO “NOT WANTING TO BE THIS WAY. NOT FOREVER.”

Wow. On-fire Fizzbot coming to take Blitzo down. This isn’t at all a manifestation of his issues that he’s steadfastly ignoring and instead siccing a dragon on. “OH, what a mouth.” SURE, BLITZO. SURE.

Thing I’m also waiting for: Stolas to actually acknowledge Moxxie and Millie. I mean. They do save his life later. Put that on your growth chart, Stolas my dude, not being a total jackass to all other imps that aren’t Blitzo (and even with Blitzo still being SUPER condescending, my hecking heck).

I wonder if Via hears all the things we the audience hear in the stuff that Stolas can’t say—your mother’s always been (mean, maybe), I haven’t been (happy), we weren’t in (love). Because, while Stolas not loving Stella is definitely one of Via’s issues still (given the s2.5 trailer), the bigger issue that Via has always had is Stolas leaving and not being there for her anymore. Which got its roots somewhere, not just from a childhood nightmare. But depression and self-hatred also do that, convince a person their loved ones are better off without them. And with the life situation Stolas is in, it’s not surprising that the more independent his daughter got, the less she saw of him, because he figured the less she needed him (the less she wanted him around). Holy CRAP it’s sad. And drilling right into my own vault of issues lol it’s fine.

(And the proof that Stolas doesn’t need Blitzo, he can protect himself and Via just fine; it’s the companionship he’s aching for, the love story he’s writing in the margins of what’s actually happening. The comfortable lie he’s telling himself and Blitzo is helping him prop up just like Blitzo’s own version. ARGH.)

“Slutty toy clown” OKAY BLITZO.

Alright, calling this post there bc it’s starting to get long. Unsurprisingly, I can go on for a while about just about anything. Future posts coming, and we’ll see how the two-episode per post thing goes when the episodes start getting longer. Toodles!